Thursday, July 24, 2008

when I fall

Yesterday picked me up, shook me by the shoulders, and opened my eyes to show me the unimportance of my role in a large part of my life.

Math is not my strong suit by any means, so bear with me while I figure this... Approximately 2,000 hours a year of my life would roughly approximate half of my waking hours. I'm devoting half my life to a role that is wholly unimportant.

This is something I can chose to remain the same, or I can chose to change. I am prepared to change. If this was a relationship of any other sort, I would have and could have walked away. But it is my livelihood.

Opportunity can be a beautiful thing that I embrace or that I run away from. Or I could cling to it until it diminishes.

Part of me thinks my heart is like a magic 8 ball... I'm still waiting to see what it says after it was shaken yesterday.

Another part of me thinks my heart needs to have no business in these sorts of decisions.

And yet another part fights for it to have even more say in these matters.

All that being said, my mantra when I awoke this morning was: "My job may not be important, but I AM IMPORTANT."

Now, what to do about that... I don't know.

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posted by Jennifer at 7/24/2008 07:38:00 PM

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