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Tuesday, October 10, 2006

spirits dancing so strange

You were being so nice to me. You had mended the things I'd let you borrow, and you were returning them and saying such nice things to me.

But I knew better. I knew you were only doing and saying those things to ease your guilt. You were banishing me from your life. I am a bad influence on you and your relationship (having failed in my marriage), and therefore, I do not fit into the mold of what your life should be.

You were crying when you said, "I love you like family." I replied, "No, you don't. If you love me like family, you love me unconditionally, no matter whether or not you approve of the way I choose to lead my life."

I preempted your attempt. I told you I knew what you were trying to do, and I hid. I ran from you, and when I decided to find you to talk, you then ran away.

An old friend busted in, literally, through a sliding glass and screen door. It had been so long since we had talked, and he was angry with me, but he still hugged me. And it was nice to know he still cared enough to not run away when I needed a friendly embrace.

And then, we killed someone. I'm not sure who or why, but it was with haste, and there were so many variables. So many variables out of our control that it drove Darrell back to smoking.

Thank goodness it was just a dream.

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posted by Jennifer at 10/10/2006 08:12:00 AM



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