Tuesday, September 14, 2004

My hormones must hate me.

I have this feeling of despair creeping up through my body. It's starting at my heart and spreading throughout my body, flowing through my arms into the center of my palms. I don't know why I'm getting this sensation, but it is a familiar one.. too familiar. The last time I felt it, I cried on and off uncontrollably for three days. Needless to say, it wasn't pretty.

There is probably a reason that I get this way. It's just the time of year. I love the Fall, but the beginning of it is always this way for me because of things that have happened in past Falls. It jars my memory about things in my past that I don't like to think about. Forgive and forget is easier said than done. I almost think it's harder to forgive myself than to forgive other people.. and part of me doesn't want to forget. So, I remember these things and I torture myself over them from time to time. There are certainly much more healthy habits out there that I should try to acquire.

So, how can I stop this feeling? Well, certainly not by focusing on it like I am now. I should stop.

posted by Jennifer at 9/14/2004 12:15:00 PM

Blogger Tiffany said...

I can relate a little bit... It is a little off topic but I got pregnant with my daughter in early spring and now when spring rolls around I get super sick LOL. I think that past events can have a direct effect on our present emotions.

Hang in there, it will pass!

9/14/2004 08:03:00 PM  

Blogger Josh said...

I never knew you got this way in the fall. I do the same thing. Not as badly as you say, but I always get really down at the end of the summer. "Summer is over, leaves have all changed. Good people hiding theirselves again. I have been burned by the sun. Cold weather runs." - Seven Mary Three "Summer is Over"

9/14/2004 10:13:00 PM  

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